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the only socially accepted way to ignore everyone while looking devastatingly cool

means Tinted glasses worn over the eyes to shield them from bright sunlight and glare.

from A transparent compound: 'sun' from Old English 'sunne' joined to 'glasses,' the plural that came to mean spectacles after glass lenses were ground for the eyes. The word is fairly modernit arrives once mass-produced tinted eyewear made shading your eyes a fashion as much as a function, in the early 20th century. Tinted lenses themselves are far older: smoke-colored quartz spectacles were used in China centuries ago, the popular story goes, to hide a judge's expression in courta fitting ancestor for an object built to keep others from reading your eyes.

roman originsEmperor Nero watched gladiators through polished emeralds
inuit ingenuityCarved bone goggles with thin slits fought snow blindness
hollywood debtStars wore them to dodge fans and bright studio lights
polarized trickThey block glare bouncing off water and roads
uv shieldDark lenses without UV protection harm eyes more
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